How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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How many archaeologists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One team, but they'll label every piece of the old one, mark its location in the room, and write a detailed description before determining that it was used to store cornmeal.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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