How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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