How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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