How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What is only a small box but can weigh over a hundred pounds?

A scale.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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