How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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