How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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