How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What is an astronauts favorite key on the keyboard?

The space bar!
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