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How do hair stylists speed up their job?
They take short cuts!
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?
A kitten.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They have machines to do that now.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?
Drinking.
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"
The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?
6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?
Do you want to grab a bite?
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.
The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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