How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.

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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.

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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.

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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.

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