How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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