How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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