How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

You crack me up!
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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