How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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