How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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Some people believe that becoming a vegitarian is just a mistake...

A Missed-steak.
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