How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.

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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.

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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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