How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.

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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.

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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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