How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess

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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.

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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What emotional disorder does a gas chromatograph suffer from?

Separation anxiety.
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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.

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