How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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