How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What are pirate's favoite treat?

Chips AHOY!!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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