How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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