How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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