How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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