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How do Vikings send secret messages?
Norse code.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?
"Let me see your birth certificate".
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
All of them.
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?
Kitty Perry
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
It's fine, he woke up.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?
A goat.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?
A centipede on its back!
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Where does the snowman hide his money?
In the snow bank.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?
How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What is black ,white and red all over?
A sunburnt penguin
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