How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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