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How do Vikings send secret messages?
Norse code.
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"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?"
I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?
2 years old.
Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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Where do you put barking dogs?
In a barking lot.
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What do you call a loony spaceman?
An astronut.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a light bulb?
One, but she'll be on the phone for five hours telling all her friends about it.
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?
The banana split
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?
Bison
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