How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What's the difference between a good lawyer and a bad lawyer?

A bad lawyer makes your case drag on for years. A good lawyer makes it last even longer.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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