How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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