How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What washes up on small beaches?

Microwaves.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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Where does the snowman hide his money?

In the snow bank.
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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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