How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!

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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!

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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.

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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.

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