How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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What is the definition of a "crying shame"?

There was an empty seat.
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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