How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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