How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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