How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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