How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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What' the difference between a lawyer and a boxing referee?

A boxing referee doesn't get paid more for a longer fight.

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.

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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.

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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.

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