How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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