How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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