How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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