How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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