How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!

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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.

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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies

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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.

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