How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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What do you call 25 skydiving lawyers?

Skeet.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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