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How do you catch a tame bird?
The tame way, unique up on it!
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?
H2O cubed.
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Why was the ant so confused?
Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What's the difference between a vacuum cleaner and a lawyer on a motorcycle?
The vacuum cleaner has the dirt bag on the inside.
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What's the best parting gift?
A comb.
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How do you make a band stand?
Take their chairs away!
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?
Because he had no BODY to go with.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?
No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?
To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?
Two babies screaming!
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