How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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