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How do you catch a tame bird?
The tame way, unique up on it!
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?
Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?
With a Tuba glue.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?
By renaming it Trump University.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?
A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What has a head but no body?
A nail.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?
Never lick the spoon!
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?
They take short cuts!
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