How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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