How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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