How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops

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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?

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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.


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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!

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