How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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