How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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