How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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