How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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