How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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