How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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