How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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