How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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