How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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