How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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