How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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