How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?

Flood lights!
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A lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a trainload of terrapins,

What a turtle disaster

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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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