How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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