How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.
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Were does a boat go when it is sick?

To the dock.
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