How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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