How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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