How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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