How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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