How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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