How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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