How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights

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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh

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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess

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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.

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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split

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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.

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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.

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