How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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