How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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