How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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