How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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