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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?
Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.
It’s a little fishy.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can't tuna fish.
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How do Eskimos make their beds?
With sheets of ice and blankets of snow.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?
One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand
and says make me one with everything.
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?
Sandy Claws.
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?
To get to the other size!
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