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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?
Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.
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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?
He gave her a ring.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
All of them.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?
He was playing by ear
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?
No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?
A computer mouse.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?
A crookodile
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?
Because it might crack up!
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?
Orange Is The New Black.
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