How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.
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