How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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