How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What kind of table has no legs.

A multiplication table.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.

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