How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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