How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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