How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.

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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.

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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.

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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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