How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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