How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What does a lawyer get when you give him Viagra?

Taller
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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