How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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