How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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Why did Lil Wayne go to the Doctor?

He was feeling a Lil Weezy

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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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