How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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