How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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What are lawyers good for?

They make used car salesmen look good.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A dead centipede.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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