How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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Why did the tree go to the dentist?

It needed a root canal.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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