How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!

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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk

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Why did the boy have his girlfriend put in jail?

She stole his heart.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."

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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated

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