How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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