How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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Where does a polarbear keep its money?

In a snow bank!
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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