How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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