How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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