How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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