How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.

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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!

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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Why was the vacationing doctor so mad?

He had no patients.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.

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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic

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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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