How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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