How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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