How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.

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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.



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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."

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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .

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