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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?
Plug its nose.
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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?
News briefs.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.
I’m just doing it for kicks.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?
A mouse on vacation.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?
Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?
Professional courtesy.
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