How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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