How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do you throw to a drowning lawyer?

His partners.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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