How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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How many dadaists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

To get to the other side.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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