How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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Why does the law society prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients?

To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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