How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.

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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .

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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.

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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.

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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.

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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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