How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Why did God invent lawyers?

So that real estate agents would have someone to look down on.
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How many UFO buffs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. You don't believe me do you? I've got photos! See that big blob? Well, just squint your eyes a bit. . . .
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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