How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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