How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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