How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?

The caterer.
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