How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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