How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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