How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card

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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.

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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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