How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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