How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck

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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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How many IBM engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just let Marketing explain that "Dead Bulb" is a feature.

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