How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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