How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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