How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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