How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do sea monsters eat for lunch?

Fish and ships.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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