How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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When can't you see a cheese?

When it's pasteurised...
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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