How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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