How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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