How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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