How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What's the difference between a tick and a lawyer?

The tick falls off when you are dead.
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