How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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Have you seen the new HGTV show about the Whitehouse makeover?

It's called "Trump It or Dump It".
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