How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Where does Friday come before Monday?

In the dictionary.
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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