How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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A seal walks into a club...
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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