How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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