How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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Why can't you say a joke while standing on ice?

Because it might crack up!
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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