How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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What do you call a young army?

Infantry.
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