How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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