How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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How many Cabbage Patch dolls does it take to change a light bulb?

The question is irrelevant, since you couldn't find the dolls even if you knew how many. (Note: Well, this was a good joke in 1983-84. . . .)
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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