How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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