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How do you make a fire with two sticks?
Make sure one is a match!
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?
Mice krispies
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."
The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?
Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?
It wasn't raining!
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?
At the baa-baa shop.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?
A Flat Major
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What is black ,white and red all over?
A sunburnt penguin
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?
Me-ow
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