How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!

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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.

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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.

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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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