How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What did the judge say to the dentist?

Do you swear to pull the tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth?
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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