How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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I'll tell you what I love doing more than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase.

I can hardly contain myself.

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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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