How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How many ergonomicists does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. Four to decide which way the bulb ought to turn, and . . .
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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