How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
Canvas not available.

or


I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, YES! That's what I bought the buggers for!

You'd be annoyed if you opened it and a socket set fell out!"

Canvas not available.

or


So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
Canvas not available.

or


How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
Canvas not available.

or


What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
Canvas not available.

or


What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

Canvas not available.

or


What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
Canvas not available.

or


How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
Canvas not available.

or






© Copyright crapjoke.com 2017-2026