How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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