How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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Why was the baseball game so hot?

Because all the fans left!
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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How many Yuppies (WASPs) does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call the electrician, and one to mix the drinks.
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