How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.

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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.

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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.

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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.

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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats

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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.

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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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