How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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How many televangelists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. Televangelists screw in motels.
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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