How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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I'll call you later.

Don't call me later, call me Dad.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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