How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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