How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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