How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What do you call a cow with three legs?

Lean beef.
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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