How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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