How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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How many BBS jokers does it take to tell yet another LBJ?

1,622. One to tell the original joke, and the rest to submit give some minor variation of it! For example:
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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