How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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Why was the mouse afraid of the water?

Catfish
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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