How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.

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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.

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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear

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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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