How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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How did the bubble gum cross the road?

On the bottom of the chicken's foot!
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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