How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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