How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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How many subscribers to AOL does it take to change a light bulb?

What? You can change light bulbs?
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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What makes music on your hair?

A head band!

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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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