How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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Where do you get whales weighed?

At the Whale-weigh station.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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