How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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