How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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