How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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