How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.

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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats

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How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.

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What did the calculator say to the math student?

You can count on me!
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