How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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How can you tell that a train just went by?

It left its tracks.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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