How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!

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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.

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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!

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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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