How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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