How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?

Take your foot off his head.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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