How do you make an egg laugh?

Tell it a yolk.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many shaggy dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Fewer than it takes to screw in a heavy bulb.
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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