How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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