How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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