How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."

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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog

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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to

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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!

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Where do fortune tellers dance?

At the crystal ball.

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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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