How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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