How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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