How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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