How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!

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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights

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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean

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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.

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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!

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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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How many Holocaust revisionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None: they just deny that the bulb ever went out in the first place.

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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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