How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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What did one flower say to the other flower?

Hey, bud!
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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