How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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