How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What do you call the king of vegetables?

Elvis Parsley.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What has three letters and starts with gas?

A car
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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