How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest.. He sent in ten different puns, in the hope that at least one of the puns would win.

Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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