How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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