How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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