How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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