How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card

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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.

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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.

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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth

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