How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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