How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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