How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
Canvas not available.

or


Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
Canvas not available.

or


How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
Canvas not available.

or


Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
Canvas not available.

or


How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
Canvas not available.

or


How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
Canvas not available.

or


A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
Canvas not available.

or


Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
Canvas not available.

or


What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
Canvas not available.

or






© Copyright crapjoke.com 2017-2026