How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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Why can't Donald Trump be a Lannister?

Because he never pays his debts.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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