How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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How many BBS jokers does it take to tell yet another LBJ?

1,622. One to tell the original joke, and the rest to submit give some minor variation of it! For example:
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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