How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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How many BBS jokers does it take to tell yet another LBJ?

1,622. One to tell the original joke, and the rest to submit give some minor variation of it! For example:
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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How do you catch a unique bird?

Unique up on it.
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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