How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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