How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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