How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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