How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What do you call a lawyer gone bad.

Senator.
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