How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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