How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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