How do you wake up Lady Gaga?

You Poke her face.

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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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