How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How many does it take to screw in a light bulb?

10. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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