How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What did the sub-atmoic ducks say?

Quark!
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What has a head but no body?

A nail.
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Why is b always cool?

Because it's between ac.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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