How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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