How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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Why are the middle ages sometimes called the Dark Ages?

Because they had so many knights.
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