How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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