How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?

Squash
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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