How does a pig go to hospital?

In a hambulance.
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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