How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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