How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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Why is tennis such a loud game?

Because each player raises a racquet.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.

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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've got you covered!
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!

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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow

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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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