How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.

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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.

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What did Cinderella say to the photographer?

Some day my prints will come.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.

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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh

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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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