How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What is Donald Trumps favorite song?

ICE ICE Baby......
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I think I want a job cleaning mirrors.


It's something I could really see myself doing.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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