How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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