How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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How many big black monoliths does it take to change a light bulb?

Sorry, light bulbs are an evolutionary dead end.
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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How many `Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?

None: A `Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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