How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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