How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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Two girls were born on the same day, same year, same parents, except they are not twins. Explain:

They are triplets.
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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