How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Why is the French horn the most divine instrument?

Man blows into it, but God only knows what comes out

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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