How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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