How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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