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How does an attorney sleep?
First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Why do pandas like old movies?
Because they are black and white.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?
Carlos.
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What does one bucket say to the other?
I am feeling pale today.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?
Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?
Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?
Laboratory Retrievers
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?
Its shadow
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Why did the lamb cross the road?
To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What did the painter say to the wall?
I got you covered.
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