How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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Where do soldiers keep their armies?

In their Sleevies!
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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