How does an attorney sleep?

First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other.
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How do Vikings send secret messages?

Norse code.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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