How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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A pair of eyebrows walked into a shop. The assistant asked, "Can I help you?"

The eyebrows replied, "no, we are just browsing"
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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