How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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"Dyslexic man walks into a bra"
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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