How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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