How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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