How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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"I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it,

it was a shitzu."
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What did the number 0 say to number 8?

Nice belt!
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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