How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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What do you call a cheese factory in the Middle East?

Cheeses of Nazareth.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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