How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite

......... one jar.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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