How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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