How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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How many supporters of George W. Bush does it take to change a light bulb?

None. First, denounce the nearest Democrats as liberal pantywaists who deliberately caused the bulb to blow. Second, announce that the Bush administration has proved that the science of electricity is faulty, so no action ever needs to be taken on global light change. Third, keep the need for a new light bulb strictly secret. Fourth, use the money for new light bulbs as an excuse for another tax cut for Bush's wealthy friends. Fifth, explain that you would never "disassemble" about the need for light, you are way too busy spreading freedom and democracy in the Middle East by eliminating freedom and democracy in the United States.
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What did the drummer get on his I.Q. Test?

Saliva
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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