How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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