How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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How many Californians does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to turn the bulb, one for support, and four to relate to the experience.
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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