How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Which search engine is popular amongst mice?

Ask Cheese.
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How many polite New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Both of them.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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