How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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What does a witch use to keep her hair up?

Scarespray!
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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