How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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