How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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