How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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