How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .

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What did the baby corn ask the mother corn?

Where is pop corn?
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.

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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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