How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What kind of band can't play music?

A rubber band.
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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How do you open the great lakes?

With the Florida Keys.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.
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