How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What do aliens on the metric system say?

Take me to your liter.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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What do you call a girl with a frog on her head?

Lilly.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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