How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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