How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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