How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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What do a baker and a millionaire have in common?

They are both rolling in the dough!
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What happened when the monster ate the electric company?

He was in shock for a week.
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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