How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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Why do ducks fly south?

Because it's too far to walk!
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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