How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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