How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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