How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What runs around a yard without moving?

A fence.
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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How many DP's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. No, two. No... How many do we have on the truck?
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