How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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