How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What did one wall say to the other?

I'll meet you at the corner.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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