How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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How do you get a cello player to play in tune?

Tell him the key signature has 8 sharps.

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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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