How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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