How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?

If one side has one, the other side has to get one. Once launched, they cannot be recalled. When they land, they screw up everything forever.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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