How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many hardware engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Any changes will have to be implemented in software.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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