How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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