How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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