How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What's round and bad-tempered?

A vicious circle.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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