How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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What do you call a guy who's born in Columbus, grows up in Cleveland, and then dies in Cincinnati?

Dead.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What is worse then having one baby screaming?

Two babies screaming!
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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