How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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