How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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