How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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