How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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Why are the floors of basketball courts always so damp?

The players dribble a lot.
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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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