How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What creature is smarter than a talking parrot?

A spelling bee!
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How many militarists does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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