How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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The oddly pleasant feeling of looking down on a physist as they drink the last of their beer.

The strange charm of a top down bottoms up.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What do you call a musician with a college degree?

Night manager at McDonalds

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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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