How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you call an exploding monkey?

A baboom
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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There was an explosion at a cheese factory in France...

all that was left was de brie.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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What's a frog's favorite drink?

Croak-a-cola.
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